CRAP/ My Journal by Al Brathway

October 25th, Tuesday/ DAMN! It has been too long since my last post. I have been in a world of psychological trouble since my... Well, you know, my last rant. No... I'm okay but, well... I'm not really okay. I have just run out of money and I still have no job. I have been interviewing but I've had no luck. I don't really know what to do at this point. I was thinking of becoming a writer but I'M ALREADY A WRITER! For several reasons, I have not sold anything. I think I'm suffering from the fear of failure and the fear of success simultaniously. That makes me sort of a schizophrenic only I don't believe that I am. So that lends itself to be being psychologically unstable, which means that I should be on some sort of medication(s)... However, I have no job so that means I cannot afford the meds I need to balance me out. So, of course, no woman will have anything to do with me because I have no job to remedy all of the other shit wrong with me, which helps to keep me be unbalanced. Being unbalanced, I worry. When I worry I get nervous. When I get nervous my head starts to hurt and I cannot maintain my balance, which makes me act like a "schizo", which lends itself to me being (psychologically) unstable and the saga continues...(HELP!) Crap!